Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Why? Why? Why?

I decided to have this "permanent" blog of mine as a memory locker. I kind of forget a lot of things. It's not that I do not want to remember, but It's just that I believe that whatever happened in the morning should be forgotten in the evening so that you could sleep well but I can't continue tolerating my emotions and let it swift away. Today, as I am typing these words, I am asking myself "Why?" A lot of WHY.

I need someone to talk to, and tell my thoughts to, good thing I have you BLOG.

First Question:
WHY DO MY DAD HAVE TO MARRY SOMEONE ELSE?

my favorite everyday WHY question. Until Know, I am wondering why my dad decided not to get back with my mom. You see, I believe that when you marry someone you should be ready for commitment, and sacrifices. Who else is there to blame for our broken family? I pity my younger brother who grew up with just sisters and a yaya around. He didn't know what it feels like to go to the Church with your parents, and eat out after.

I promised myself that I WON'T GET MARRIED AND I WON'T HAVE A FAMILY. I know myself, I know what I am capable of and I can say that I won't make a good wife, or a mother.
I just hope that my parents measured themselves well.
So, Pa, Why did you get married? What is it for because I can't see the logic in getting married then filing for a divorce. If it's just for making us legitimate then FUCK.

Second Question:
Why some people do not know how to say Thank You?

Today on my way home from the hospital with my uncle and auntie, I saw my cousin waiting for a ride. So I asked my uncle to stop and pick up my cousin. Then when we got to our compound gate, I went out the car with my tita to open the gate and my cousin follow. I thought he was going to help open the gate. I did not hear anything from him. Not a good night, or a THANK YOU! So another FUCK for not teaching your children to say Thank You! Saying Thank You is one way to see what kind of person you really are.

Third Question:
Why am I still awake when I have an early morning class tomorrow. Another FUCK for me! No for the people who made me think.

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Family affair

Last Thursday my Lola got into an accident. She was going out the bus, then the bus suddenly moved. she fell and broke her right hip. She is 85 years old already. It's useless blaming the driver, or whoever because it won't take back the pain it caused my Lola. She is currently staying in the hospital. I stayed there the whole day with my cousins and aunties. I love my Lola but I've been busy "growing up" and "discover things". She was the one who took care of me and my ate when my parents were away working. Today memories wander my mind, I remember all the cheerful moments with my lola. I hope and I pray that everything would go well, her health and her operation.